Over the course of this past summer, I realized that I'd gained a bit of weight. It probably wasn't even noticeable to anyone, but I finally became aware of it when some of my shorts and pants didn't fit as comfortably as they had the previous summer.
At first, I reasoned that I had just been eating too much; ergo, I would eat less and the weight would go away. I'd done it in the past. Easy peasy. But try as I might, that didn't work. My eating habits just didn't change. As I'd sort of expected all along, my human will-power wasn't effective, wasn't really a power at all. And besides, I didn't want a quick fix, so I knew I needed to pray, and pray scientifically--because it brings permanent healing.
One of the first things I had to do, was to deny that gradually putting on weight was just a part of aging. It's not. God's "mercies are new every morning," and we are God's image, His exact likeness. We are brand new every morning. We are ageless. And that sly suggestion that "This is normal; nothing is wrong," is precisely the suggestion that would keep us from ever working to overcome errors--that would quash our efforts before they begin.
Next, I realized that the problem wasn't really increased body size. It was that food was constantly on my mind. It was like I was hypnotized always to be thinking of food! This became clear to me when I was on a family vacation towards the end of the summer. Any time we went out for our daily adventures, I was worried I'd get hungry before we ate again. Talk about a downer for a vacation!
But the realization that, as with every problem, thought was what needed correcting--not a material body--marked the beginning of the end for this dilemma.
Over the next week or so, I thought about Jesus' counsel to, "Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than meat, and the body than raiment?" He then goes on to explain that just as God feeds the birds, and arrays the lilies in beautiful blossoms, so he will care for us because we, as His children, are infinitely more precious to Him than birds and flowers.
And that's exactly what I hadn't believed. I had a laundry list of situations I was worried about at the time--over the whole summer, in fact. Relationships. Finances. Projects to complete. You name it. And as I prayed, it came to me that I had been eating bigger meals than necessary, and eating more frequently than necessary, because of the temporary sense of comfort it gave me. But that's just it--it was temporary. I knew God was the only source for any lasting comfort and peace I could feel. And I knew it was my right to feel that peace and comfort.
Finally, one day, the afternoon approached, and I realized that I had actually felt hungry all day, including during and after eating my lunch. "How ABSURD!" I thought. At that point it was so obvious to me that the urge to be eating was just a misguided thought, that I actually laughed about it. And with that, the sense of hunger vanished--as if I'd had a "hungry" switch, and someone turned it off!
So, have I lost the weight? Materially, I don't know. I'm not really checking anymore. But mentally, absolutely! I've lost the real weight--I've been freed of the burden of excessive thought about food and my body.
Amen!! :-)
New every morning
God's image and likeness
Take no thought
